Inheritance

you have the eyes of a dead man, and i carry in my first name the spirit of a dead woman. my child will some day have my body, but maybe they too will carry the spirit of a dead woman with a tongue so heavy with her own language that she will fail to…

The Insides of My Mouth

i nurse fear at the back of my throat. it hums softly sometimes, almost as if to tease me. to remind me of its existence, to remind me why it’s there and who put it there. i want to break the fast of silence that has been holding onto my tongue. i want to run…

Brownie Points

It is the morning after,  You half naked and full of eyes, Look at me. Stare at me, And I avoid. My eyes  Purposely miss yours, As if we hadn’t spent the night Before looking into each other, Searching for each other. I think I saw too much  Of myself in you. Our hands became…

The Love I Thought I Deserved

Over six years ago, in the middle of my first year in university and after my first silent protest, I got up the courage to tell my mother of the sexual violence that happened to me as a child. Her reaction was silence. Followed by demands to know who hurt me. I refused to tell…

Dis-Tract-Ion

  I find myself in a town outside Dar es salaam, In a motel. Naked, Smoking a cigarette with a half empty bottle of gin. I remember exactly what happened here last night: Nothing. Maybe a bit of porn and masturbation. But apart from that, I’ve been trying to figure the math behind rain, And…

Memories of My Father

My father calls me in and i am five years old. He places me infront of him, in the living room of our old house in Sinza and stares me dead in the face. My mother is busy being a mother in the house and my younger sister might be getting fed or bathed. Our…

The Color Of Pain

My mother always wore her pain on her sleeves. Except on public holidays, When friends and family came over. On these days she wore them on her eyes, At the back of her sockets. And if you paid attention, during the saying of grace, or the passing round of food, it would creep up on…